First Exercise - Build your Mindfulness Muscle

This is about being in the moment (dreadful phrase). It's not about what I did in the past (that thing I deeply regret, and the person's dead, so I can do nothing about it except torment myself). And it's not about the future, where I may be lonelier than I am now, with even more people dead, and only a cat for company (if I'm lucky).

No, this is about living in the now because this book says that the present can often be the most bearable place to be. Well, maybe. The authors do helpfully add -

'Even when the present moment is painful, focusing on what's happening right now can help by preventing you from layering on the pain of the past and the pain of the future to the pain of the present.'

To learn how to live in the now I need to use 'What' skills. The what here is what I'm actually doing when I'm practising mindfulness. And what I'm doing, or going to be doing, is -

Observing

Describing

Participating

I also need to look at how I'm doing these things. These are the 'How' skills -

One-Mindfully

Non-judgementally

Effectively

Now to the exercise. I am going to take these 'Whats' and 'Hows' and apply them to something I've had a bit of practice at - 

 Drinking a bottle of lager (mindfully)

So, I get the lager from the fridge. I'm combining it with a piece of Brie and some cherry tomatoes. I've always found taking the cap off a lager bottle very satisfying - it's the combination of the fizz of the gas escaping, and the sound of the bottle cap hitting whatever it lands on.

I take my usual first sip - straight from the bottle. Mmmm. Refreshing. The book urges me to notice the smell of the lager, and the cheese, and the texture too. So, I do this. I slowly bite into a cherry tomato. It tastes just like a tomato, so all is well. It's worth mentioning that I'm eating this feast off a bright orange Le Creuset plate, and that I've always been very fond of its shiny orangeyness.

I do feel a bit different as I continue my mindful meal. I am urged to notice each bite of food, and each sip of lager. It all takes more effort. I've never been the slowest of eaters, and in lockdown I got so anxious about my anxious attachment issues I developed oesophagitis and gastritis.

The book asks me -

'Did you notice anything about the food that you hadn't noticed before or had forgotten?'

Yes, Brie yields nicely to your fingertips when you pick it up, and its skin is smooth.  I feel weird saying this, as if I keep people in a cellar for my own amusement.

'How does this experience compare to when you mindlessly eat something, barely paying attention until you realize that there is nothing left?'

 Well, it's better, I guess. It might also keep indigestion at bay. I still have a bit of my lager to drink so I'll give that my full attention now.